I remember vividly the day when I walked into the supermarket and saw an acquaintance. An acquantaince, who, a few years back had told me that kids weren’t on the agenda…. but here she was, bumping into me in the supermarket with her 8-months-pregnant belly.
My heart sank.
For some reason in the back of my mind, I was always going to pip her at the post to having children.
All of a sudden my heart felt like it was beating out of my chest, the tension and panic in my body began to rise and I could feel the tears in my eyes.
I blurted out “oh hey, ah, I’ve actually got to be somewhere” before I ran to the car, raced home and then ran into the walk in robe and sobbed.
This wasn’t fair.
This journey of infertility had taken the best of me, and here I now was, day after day, a blubbering mess and a shadow of my former self.
My husband didn’t get it and he didn’t know what to do with me.
I cried ALL THE TIME, and I didn’t know how I was going to get to the end of the day most of the time, let alone the end of this f*cked journey.
Fast forward a few months and I’d just had my first IVF retrieval, and had copped hyperstimulation. I felt like death warmed up, with seven kilograms of fluid around my belly.
I couldn’t sleep properly.
I couldn’t breathe properly.
I couldn’t stand up straight.
And I felt oh so nauseous.
But surprise, I was pregnant!
The pain was worth it. Woohoo.
And then I was told the pregnancy wasn’t viable and that I needed to induce a medical miscarriage.
At that moment, I felt like my world had come crashing down.
I felt like I was handling infertility, and I was handling OHSS, but a miscarriage? This was rock bottom.
I’d officially lost every ounce of happiness and didn’t feel like I could cope any longer.
It was too hard.
But then, I decided I needed to claw myself out from the funk.
I read, and read, and read. I consulted with people who knew about mindset, and I implemented strategies to help me cope.
And not only did I pull myself back, but I learnt things that have made a profound impact on my life and make me feel like I can handle anything the universe throws at me, and this is what I want to share.
I’ve had this fire burning in me for such a long time to share this info because my overarching goal in everything I do is that I don’t want anyone to feel the same way I felt. Because infertility sucks.
And the day has now come, and I’m so proud to share my hard work with everyone, because I know that for so many people out there, my program, Be a Fertility Warrior, can be the difference between a sobbing mess on the floor, and handling infertility like a boss.
If you’d like to find out more about Be a Fertility Warrior – head to https://moderndaymissus.com/fertilitywarrior
Act quick though – the doors close on 23 October, before we begin on 30 October.
If you’re struggling with infertility, I’d love to see you there.