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Life After Infertility: Am I Traumatised?


Life After InfertilityTrigger Warning: This episode contains references to life after infertility. I will be talking about my kids and my experience with miscarriage. Listener discretion is advised.

Today’s podcast is by popular demand. It’s one of the biggest questions I’m asked.

People wonder what my life is like these days and what I think they’re really asking (and many do) is, “Am I traumatised?” “Has my experience with infertility forever changed me?” “Am I forever scarred?”

I say it often–I can remember my experience very vividly–all of the tears, all of the meltdowns, all of the drastic health and wellbeing changes I made.

I’ll never forget my trip to Lombok when we threw our hands in the air after my miscarriage and thought, “Screw Infertility!” I was losing hair like nobody’s business, I had been walking around work with tears in my eyes, unable to focus and I felt at the time like I didn’t want to share my journey with anyone.

I didn’t feel like I could cope any longer or survive another round, frozen or fresh. At the time, it felt like I was done, and truth be told, like I had nothing to live for.

Things changed pretty rapidly after that moment. I feel like sometimes we need to experience the crushing lows in order to experience the highs.

Life looks radically different to that time, and that person… I wouldn’t even recognise her.

So, today on the podcast I’m sharing with you what my pregnancies, early motherhood and day-to-day looks like, warts and all. Most importantly though, I want to share with you some tips that you can implement NOW, to help you cope with the huge changes that come with motherhood and pregnancy.

Key Takeaways and Robyn’s Tips:

  • Everything passes. It’s all an age and a stage. Everything has new challenges and difficulties you need to overcome.
  • Fuck what they say about calm mum, calm baby. I’m quite a calm and patient mum, but sometimes they still lose their shit and you can’t help that. But do try to be calm wherever you can because everything’s going be OK in the end. It gets better at 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months and 6 months and I feel like it gets way easier.

Am I traumatised after infertility? No, I am not traumatised, yes life is great but yes, motherhood is quite a challenge and quite hard!